Is it normal to miss your booty call?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
