there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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