She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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