Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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