her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
