READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
