just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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