I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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