there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
