So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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