Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
His nipple licking is glorious
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