first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
