I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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