JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
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You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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