he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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