big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
