her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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