I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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