This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
