is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
