the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Couch. On fire.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
