There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
