i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Buhtt sex?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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