This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
