You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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