How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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