oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize