I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
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