Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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