yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
