weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize