the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I still have a little drunk in my system
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Randomize