god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
