i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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