Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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