You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
