this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
