Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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