Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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