She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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