Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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