My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
