He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize