Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
