yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
