If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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