that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
