Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
