Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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