so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
i think i just lost a toe
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
